XM Radio

Today, I was on Oprah XM Radio. Talked with Dr. Robin....I asked her how to implement all the ideas out there on how to NOT be such a people pleaser. She said that first you had to figure out why you are a people pleaser. It's usually out of fear. I know that I'm afraid of confrontation and people not liking me. She said that fear usually stems from a deep trauma or conflict. All I can think of is Debbie's death. I always thought that it was my fault. I thought that I had brought home the chicken pox and that's how she died....taking aspirin with the chicken pox. It wasn't until just a few years ago, that I discovered, through pictures, that it wasn't until about '68 that we all got the chicken pox. So, I didn't cause Debbie's death. Dr. Robin said to imagine what that "child" must've felt like. Not deserving, the shame, the guilt. And that people pleasing was my way of trying to make it up to everyone. That I've pretty much lived my entire life feeling as if I were to blame, somehow. I have to learn to let this go....maybe practice the Sedona method on this one! I'll try that tomorrow.

TGIF

Man, I'm so glad it's Friday. Very tired. Did pedicures last night, got home around 10pm. It was fun, but I could sleep all day today....NOT! I'm at work. I'm going to go home and take a nice nap with my little Beau dog!!
Must be PMS'ing.....sitting here eating chocolate.....major breakouts on my chin. Gave in to the craving!
Well, nothing exciting here...guess I'll journal again later.

Gratitudes:
#1---My family. Thank God for them. They are the source of most of my angst, but they are all of the love that I receive!!!

#2---My job. I really do like it. I don't have to deal with people, I have some "me" time and no one watches over my shoulder.

#3---Shirley. She is a true friend. I wish we could spend more time together, but I appreciate the fact that we are there for each other, no matter what's going on!

#4---Woody. What would I do without him? I've known him my entire life and I know that God chose him for me. Our souls and our selves are so intertwined now. I love him.

#5---Our pets and our home life. It makes me grin just to think of them and it. My home is truly MY sanctuary. And my pets keep the life in the home! : )

Valentine's Day, 2007

Well, I wonder what today will bring...? I did a handmade card for Woody and a really cool scrapbook with his surfing pictures. He loved it and seemed genuinely happy with it. Some of the sayings (stickers) that I found were so appropriate. I think one of them said something like "The waves of the sea bring me back to me."
I am married to a VERY un-romantic man. But, from what I hear, that's how most of them are...not all, but most. I guess most of us women would just like to have a little bit of romance in every day.....forget this one day a year pressure!
We were supposed to go to a Twenty Group meeting this weekend...now we're not. Woody has to go to some meeting in Raleigh and Fred really wants him there. Gee....Raleigh or Marco Island, Florida??? Which would you rather go to?? I'm bummed. I really wanted to get away---and to warmth and sunshine and the ocean.
At least we're not in blizzard conditions! See? There's always something to be thankful for!